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Marriage Talks: Extended Family

Emily Norris marriage

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.
- Ephesians 5:31

When a married couple starts out they are already dealing with a lot of change. This can be compounded by outside pressures. Namely, your extended family. Families are held in the highest regard by most. Because of this, after a marriage there can be some familial issues due to the change a marriage brings about. To stay ahead of any problem areas that lay ahead talk about some common family issues now. Here are some questions to get you started.

  • Where will you spend holidays? Will you rotate? What about if your family lives out of state?
  • How will you decide on helping extended family if the issue arise, either monetarily or in other ways?
  • What family obligations do you already have? Financially? Sunday dinners a must? Yearly family reunions? Bring everything out in the open so you both are on the same calendar.
  • How will you handle extended family and their well meaning advice? The union between a husband and wife is sacred. Be very careful who you allow into that intimate bond.
  • What amount of time is considered a visit by a family member?
  • How will you handle unannounced guests?

I think the biggest lesson you can learn is that ultimately when you get married both sides of the family become “our family” not yours or mine. Accept this simple truth and you will be way ahead of the curve.

What are your thoughts or experiences?

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